Allow me to introduce you to my son’s bedroom floor — Ryan Wexelblatt (ADHD Dude)
𝗔𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄 𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗼 𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝗴𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗿 𝘀𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝘀𝗼𝗻’𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗱𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗺 𝗳𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗿. 𝟳 𝗲𝗺𝗽𝘁𝘆 𝘀𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝗼𝘀𝘁, 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝗸𝗲𝗻 𝗸𝗲𝘆𝗯𝗼𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗼𝘂𝘁.
𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗜 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀:
1. I can constantly nag him to put the cans in the recycling. (Nagged and prompted him for years, that doesn’t seem to give him any sense of urgency to do what I ask.)
2. I can pick them up myself, and if I do that I’m denying him the opportunity to build his own executive function skills, because I’m acting as his executive functioning, instead of letting him use his own.
3. I can use language that will help him improve his self-directed talk (“Brain Coach”) while also teaching him personal responsibility.
Do you regularly clean up after your son/daughter when she doesn’t do what you asked? Have you considered how that is both creating a sense of entitlement (“people should clean up after me”) as well as denying him/her the opportunity to use his/her executive function skills?
How about getting off of screen devices without nagging or arguing? Any success with that?
ADHD is an 𝘦𝘹𝘦𝘤𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘥𝘦𝘭𝘢𝘺, it i̲s̲ ̲n̲o̲t̲ a psychological issue.
Lagging executive function skills are not a behavior problem, although often misperceived that way by parents and professionals who do not understand ADHD.
𝗜’𝗺 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲:
-If you are still regularly nagging, prompting, yelling you’re only frustrating yourself, straining your relationship with your child.
-If you are regularly cleaning up after him/her, you are denying the opportunity to develop his/her executive function skills while simultaneously making life at home harder for you.
𝗘𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗙𝘂𝗻𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 “𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘆”, 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝘆 𝘀𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗹𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗻 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗰𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝗿 𝘀𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗽𝗶𝘀𝘁’𝘀 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗲. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗼𝘄𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗼𝗻/𝗱𝗮𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝗲𝗿. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗳𝗶𝘅𝗲𝘀, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗻𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗴𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝗘𝘅𝗲𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗙𝘂𝗻𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗵 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗣𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀.
Executive Function Crash Course is available in the ADHD Dude Membership Site. You can read the Frequently Asked Questions about membership here: https://bit.ly/2UuHd67
I encourage you to read what parents have to say about it here: https://bit.ly/3BnnlCv